Yes, it has been a very long time since I've written anything, and I'm sure that many of you have stopped reading because you think I've given up on blogging.

Not so! I'm sure December has been as busy for everyone else as it has for me, and I must say that there have been many distractions keeping me from updating the public at large about my teaching experiences.

The last month was full of ups and downs. I've said before that teaching is a very emotional job. One moment you can be pleased as punch with a fabulous lesson and the next minute your students are bullying each other and you feel completely helpless. Then after lunch you give a quiz and they all do well, but by the end of the day you find out that your problem kid, who has been so good so far this week, just punched another kid on the playground.

this is my life now.

In honor of the holiday season and all its good cheer, I'll keep this post positive. Despite my overwhelming shortcomings as a teacher (and yes, that's fair to say because all first year teachers are behind the curve - it's only natural!) I am making great progress this year. Though I haven't begun them yet....oops...I have a lot of projects planned for the break. I have completely restructured my reading block. On a whim one day I had an idea of how to put it together, and I went with it. By the end of the day I had a beautiful plan and brought it to the reading specialist who was very impressed with it. It provides me with a more clearly structured way to prepare reading lessons for the week, incorporates specific time to teach spelling concepts and other grammar points, allows time for writing, gives plenty of time for guided reading, and makes it a cinch to know what homework to assign. I'm really excited about it and I think it will be good for me and for the kids. At this point I just need to think through the actual action plan, and it should be ready for kickoff on Jan. 4th when we come back.

I also have a space unit to plan for science. And I want to figure out a way to incorporate more guided math into my math block. These are ambitious tasks, but as I explained to a colleague before I left, I'm tired of sitting around feeling like I don't know what I'm doing. I know I can handle this and I want to keep improving because I can! I hate that cycle that is so easy to enter as a teacher. You know the one - You get a handle on most things but there are things about the curriculum that kind of bug you and you don't quite know how to fix it and your kids are mostly taken care of but the ones that have extra needs aren't really getting them met, but you're giving about all you feel like so you guess it's ok......

I hate it. So I'm not doing it anymore. I'm going to keep growing. I'm working hard to be better. I want to finish this year feeling very successful, even if my kids are particularly difficult and their parents are in my face and I'm overwhelmed. I'm determined to keep improving little by little, one subject at a time.

Merry Christmas and HAPPY VACATION!!