I teach for moments like this:
Today our first shipment of Scholastic book orders came in. The kids were so excited to pick up the books they had ordered (and been waiting on for a month thanks to their overwhelmed teacher!) The magic, however, happened when I opened the pack of 10 free books given to me by the Scholastic company for putting in a September order. As I read the titles, the kids literally flocked and were FIGHTING over the books because they were so excited to read the new titles. This one:
...was a particular favorite. Yay for excited readers!!

Hello friends.

Today I would like to comment on progress. Mine, specifically :-)

I have to say that I have come a LONG LONG LONG LONG way from where I started. Last year I was green as can be. So inexperienced, without any knowledge of how to teach reading, without any knowledge of how to function completely on my own. Let me tell you, you learn to swim quickly when you are thrown into a lake with no life preserver. That's kind of how my first year of teaching was. Last year I learned how to tread water so I wouldn't drown. And luckily, my kids made some growth, passed the isats, and ultimately did pretty ok.

Now this year, I think I have jumped a few levels in swimming lessons. I firmly believe it has a lot to do with all the reflecting I did on my first year. I spent the whole summer thinking about how things went and what I wanted to change. Now, here I sit, Monday of week 5, and I'm worlds ahead of where I was.

This is all excellent news!!! But....
here's the problem.

No matter how much I progress, or how far I feel like I've come, I'm still not where I wish I was. And what really stinks, is that there are brand new teachers in my building who are past where I am now....in their FIRST YEAR. This makes me feel inadequate. As if I will never get to the level they are, even though I've been doing this a year longer and should be wiser. Pure insecurity.

I have my first evaluation meeting this week, and I'm hoping that a talk with my principal will help put things into perspective for me. I need a little feedback, a little reassurance that I'm on track. Teachers don't get pats on the back very often, but they really help you keep going in the right direction.

A new week at school, and the kids came back with their memories intact. Good things about today:

- I started reading and responding the letters kids wrote to me and learned 2 things - 4th graders need a lot of work on their spelling (some even write lowercase b's and d's!), and these kids have a very good knowledge of sentence structure especially compared to fifth graders

- I have some sensitive kids in my room. I have to remember that I'm dealing with little innocent personalities here. They are not the hardened snotty kids from last year.

- The kids read for 20 minutes before anyone looked away from their books. We're on our way to good stamina!

- During that 20 minutes I was able to look ahead and make some reasonable goals for getting my literacy block where it needs to be this year. I'm pretty proud of that :-)

- 4th graders smile a lot. And when they do, I remember why I wanted to do this in the first place.

I survived the first week!!!

...and I still want to go back :-)

This is a feat that I never imagined. Honestly. After the turmoil of my first year - and no, I am NOT exaggerating - it is hard for me to believe that I am actually enjoying this as much as I am. I have a really great group of kids. It's been only 4 days and I already have a few favorites. By the end of the year last year, there were very few students that I was sad to see go. That should never be the case. If you've bonded properly with your class and you've formed good relationships and a strong community I would expect that you would be a little sad to see them leave you. All ups and downs aside, you still really care about those kids.

Last year I just never achieved that bond. It was a rough group, to be sure, but there were so many outside factors contributing to my frustration throughout the year. Put that together with being a first year teacher in a district that believes firmly in teacher autonomy with no set reading or writing curriculum and you get one disheveled, angry, stressed out Katy.

A long summer of nothing but mindless television really did wonders for my attitude. And here I am, actually enjoying my job again. But don't get any ideas. I was still very ready for Friday.

A few highlights from the week:
1. 4th graders have such infectious smiles. When they are happy, it spreads over their whole face. Not to mention that they are so little and eager to please their teacher. They. are. adorable.

2. I made a reference to the tv show "icarly" yesterday when I was talking to them about their reading contracts. I think I said "If you don't read your goal of 100 minutes this week because you were too busy watching the latest icarly episode, that is not a good excuse!" I had them ROLLING in the aisles. hysterical.

3. I never stayed at work past 4pm this week, and I have decent plans for next week. I've transitioned well and I'm embracing some new ideas this year. I started teaching the foundation lessons for the Daily 5 (which is a dream. You're right Miss G!) and I've slowed myself down a bit to get all the routines and such established. It's my nature to want to rush through all this because I feel like I'm supposed to be teaching "real" content right off the bat. That just isn't so. Even my principal mentioned to another girl on my team that she doesn't expect us to be teaching content until October! All these routines and procedures and classroom community building activities are far more important at this point. All of these set the stage for a great year, and for more efficient work later on.

4. I really like my new team members. I was so sad to see 2 of my closest coworkers go at the end of last year. I had some survivor's guilt due to the way things went down on our team. HOWEVER, my new mini-team members seem to share my teaching philosophy, and we have begun a great relationship where we have great communication. It is especially nice because they are not as established in their own routines, and we are all a little bit more in the same boat of not knowing exactly how we want to proceed with everything. We have made plenty of group decisions, and I no longer feel like I"m a burden. If anything, they look to me for guidance - this is crazy, but it's working.

So......yay! first week, check!

First day of school.

Let me just put it this way: it is 4:09 and I am blogging. That means that I have already prepared for tomorrow's class, tied up some loose ends, commuted, and settled in to watch Barefoot Contessa on the food network.

Last year at this time, I was still at school running around like a crazy and trying to figure out what the heck I was supposed to do next. I think I stayed at school till 5pm for the first month because I didn't know how to manage everything there was to do. I think it's safe to say that this year will be a little different :-) I remarked to my teacher friend Miss G. (you can find her teacher blog here) that I feel so much more in control, and felt that way all day. I had a laundry list of things to get through, and I didn't get through them all. I felt ok about this at the end of the day because I know that the first month is all about getting things set for the year. I changed gears easily as I noticed the kids needed a break here and there and added and subtracted things on my list with ease!

Now please, don't misunderstand - I'm not a master teacher. I'm not even that GOOD at it yet! But having a sense of calm and being able to maintain it is something more than I can say for most days last year.

I'm excited about my class too. The kids were well-behaved, polite, and got along well. They were good listeners and participated when I asked them to. Now, of course, it's the first day and they're too nervous to act out, but I'm hoping that by setting the stage with clear expectations, they will not be shocked when I turn into a mean teacher ;-)

I hope there's more good to come!

The first year of teaching is hard.

I think that everyone handles the difficulty of the first year differently. It must depend on where the challenges lie, the frequency with which they arise, and how people rise to the occasion to help you.

My first year of teaching was pretty hard. Maybe you got that impression when I stopped writing this year. But now I'm approaching the point where I'm ready to try again. I always wanted to be a teacher. It's the only thing I ever anticipated becoming, and now that I'm there I'm not about to shrink away before I've given it a fair shot. It's what I'm built for, and because of that I am getting ready to try again. New year. New staff. New kids. New curriculum. New ATTITUDE.

A friend of mine recently told me she read my blog and it scared her a little. She's studying to be a teacher too. This just reinforced for me how important it is that I approach this year with renewed strength and perseverance. I know I can do it, and I know I can do it better than last year.

It's been a while, I know. But it's that time of year.......


ISAT PREP


ew. I hate it.

Now, before I get crazy complaining about it, I have to say I have it better than most. But here's my big dilemma: My school has no reading curriculum. Without a curriculum, it makes it extraordinarily difficult for a brand spankin' new teacher to know what the hell to teach. So imagine my dismay when we started all this nonsense a couple of weeks ago and I realized that I had not explicitly taught the skills my students needed to be successful on these tests! Ah, the joys of teaching.....??

On a positive note, I think I wrote recently about re-formatting my literacy block. Let me tell you, it turned out AWESOME. I have had the most productive month of reading. Every kid has a schedule that they know how to follow. They have all the expectations laid out for them in a weekly packet (that is low stress to create). There is exactly one assignment that needs to be completed for a grade every day (but I only grade 2 assignments a week) and the kids are not allowed to ask me any questions (aka they must be independent workers!) until the 3rd 20 minute period of the block. I have students working independently, in small groups, reading and writing, working with words and creating meaning, reading in guided groups with me, all simultaneously!

I'm just really proud is what I think I mean to say. I created meaning and purpose in a non-existent curriculum. I gave students direction and they have said to me over and over how much they enjoy the new schedule. I don't feel stressed out anymore because it's easy to plan and the kids are doing what they are supposed to. It's pretty great :-)

And things are going well in general I suppose. So.....yay!